Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) in New York City, NYS and Colorado
Change the negative cycle and build a safer, stronger bond
In person in NYC/Brooklyn • Teletherapy across New York State, Massachusetts and Colorado
You repeat the same argument and can’t seem to get unstuck.
You want closeness but find yourself protecting, shutting down, fixing or getting louder.
Trust injuries (affair discovery, secrecy, broken agreements) keep resurfacing.
You need more dependable repair, reassurance and teamwork.
You want a model that is LGBTQIA+ affirming and CNM aware.
Is This You?
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) helps couples (and adapted for CNM constellations) identify the negative interaction cycle (pursue/withdraw, criticize/defend, numb/escalate) and create new moments where one partner reaches differently and the other responds with care. With safety and structure, you’ll have conversations and experiences that build trust and make repair reliable.
EFT in Plain English
Map the Cycle (Not the Villain): We locate triggers, meanings and protective moves without blame.
Safety First: We slow escalations and coach gentler start ups so vulnerability can land.
Bonding Moments: We create structured conversations where one partner shares softer needs and the other responds, which is the core of change.
Practice Repair: We build repairs that actually land and establish rituals that protect the bond.
Consolidate: We translate new patterns into habits for stress, transitions, and intimacy.
What EFT Sessions Look Like
When intimacy is impacted by shame or pain, I integrate IFS for protectors and EMDR for charged memories, alongside Sex Therapy practices at a pace that feels safe. I also use Gottman tools (gentle start-up, repair attempts, shared meaning) to support day to day teamwork.
When I Blend EFT
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Skills help, but EFT targets the bond underneath. When the bond feels safer, skills stick.
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No. We work with the pattern, not against either partner.
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Yes. We use structured trust, repair and bonding conversations to rebuild safety and accountability.
FAQs
For consent based intimacy work and next steps, see Sexual Concerns and Sex Therapy.
Helpful Next Pages
In person in New York City/Brooklyn. Teletherapy anywhere in New York State, Massachusetts and Colorado.
Location & Access
Let’s help you find each other again, safely and with care.
[Schedule a Free Consultation]